The ugly rumors are true.

The new Liz Phair single sounds like a horrible alterna-pop song, of the caliber that would make me change the station back to NPR if it presented itself on my car radio.

I worshipped her for so many years.

My friend, the other Liz in my life, wrote this to me in her goodbye opus when I quit my job and moved to California:

And remember that most of the answers to life's questions can be found in Liz Phair songs.

Something tells me that's not true anymore, with lyrics like:

"We're already wet and we're going to go swimming."

"It's an itch we have to scratch, going to take awhile for this egg to hatch."

Ugh.