Sometimes I get paid a lot of money to write 1,100 words. But she just does it in her spare time.

The irony of this is, I was feeling like I owed her an email, so I actually logged in to my Web-based email to drop her a line. Maybe tell her about my week, show her that I could be a good daughter and proactive about writing to her instead of waiting for her to write to me (which is what usually happens).

Except she'd already had the same idea. She'd beaten me to the punch, and this email was HUGE. I pointed it out to my officemate, who said "If my mother sent me an email like that, I'd kill her."

Thing is, my mother doesn't really write about anything in her emails. She does not ponder the inner workings of universe nor share new and inspiring ideas in these compositions of hers. Instead, she shares every last detail of things that have happened to her over recent days.

She always starts with a weather report. Now that I live in California, I get the report both for Ohio and for here. "Well, we are getting a nice break from winter. Today is sunny, and supposed to reach a high of 55. More rain tonight and tomorrow, but staying warm. Then, with tomorrow's front, the colder weather will return on Friday, with a high of 38. We'll see people running around today in shorts, you can bet on that! Terry said you guys were getting hit with another rainy front out there. Did you really see ten inches of rain? We heard San Fran was supposed to get that much!"

Then on to other things. One of the lengthiest diatribes this afternoon was about how my stepfather's [whatever it was, she never said] had not arrived by the 18th and she was getting worried. So she listed the name of each customer service representative for me, the date and time she spoke with them, and exactly what she said in the angry emails she sent them when they did not resolve her problem.

Anyway, I was so busy today I couldn't even think about responding to her; way too overwhelming. So as I was getting ready to slink away from my desk at 6:00 this evening ... she called me. And I had to admit I didn't read her email. And she was not pleased.

So somehow, I've committed myself to answering her email this evening. I could potentially be up much of the night.