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1�0�101010�0�1 2002-02-05, 3:46 p.m.

a little late-twenties wisdom


I like finding diaries that sound like me when I was in high school and early college. The shameless attempt at poetic wretchedness, the yearning sobs of "Why are you torturing me and breaking my delicate little heart?" I kept all my notebooks from those days, and when I go back and read them I realize I only wrote in them when there was some creepy guy involved. I have no record of all the growing and learning I did, just painful details of self-loathing over some insecure Midwestern boy.

I sound so wise and mature and stuff. Healthy. Old. I'm going to make my children absolutely crazy with all this voice of experience crap.

It's boring at work today. I'm starting my tech writing class tonight. I'm really looking forward to it, to learning something brand new that will actually help me plan a new career. I miss taking classes; I always am so much more inspired when I'm listening to new ideas on a regular basis.

I talked to Liz today. The Web site was down, and I was worried that the company had bitten it once and for all. Not that I would have been surprised, but I feel like I still have an emotional investment in the success of the company � even if watching it die is only good for some good, satisfying gossip. But I still care about a few people there, namely Liz. She's becoming a Pilates rock star. I should have her bend me around a little when I visit in May.

It's painful, missing her so much. I still think of that city as a home, even though I hated living there, but there a few souls still there who touched me deeply. It hurts to be so far away from them. Going back in May will be incredible, though I know the time will be too short.



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